Stupid, STUPID Day…

Unlike the nudists who insist that winter was invented by the clothing companies, I think there is something to the conspiracy of Valentine’s Day being invented by the candy & greeting card market. For just a few dollars on this one special day, you can go out and make a declaration of your love that they guarantee can’t be expressed in months or years of loyalty, devotion, laughter, tears or emotional bonding.

Of course, despite all this, that didn’t stop me from scurrying off and buying the meager rose I could afford, or writing the love letter, or placing these pathetic love offerings on the girlfriend’s drawing table while she sleeps (and is still sleeping as of the moment of this writing) hoping that this will be enough to placate her and say, “I really care, but I’m also really broke right now, so please don’t make me sleep on the couch tonight…”

Of course, in a sick, sad, emotionally retarded sort of way, it’s also a kick and a half, since this is the first time I’ve ever actually been in a position where I COULD get someone Valentine’s Day stuff, so there’s that victim of consumerist-societal-conditioning that whispers, “Yes! There is someone I have to spend money on! I AM AT LONG LAST A REAL BOY! HOLD ME, GEPETTO! NO, NOT THERE, YOU OLD LECH…”

So yeah, for those of you who were regular victims of my old mass mails before I started blogging, there will be, much to your relief, no Valentine’s Day rant about how much you all suck, how much I hate you all, and how much I’m going to punish myself because someone loves you and no one loves me, so there… Yeah, and I’m reeeeeal sure you’re all going to miss its absence this year…